Dr. Cool, You Gotta be Kiddin' Me!

So Clark and I had dentist appointments today. Our dentist is the most supercoolest guy, and so I don't mind going... even though I always get lectured by Josie, the dental assistant, on the proper way to floss. Anyway, I digress: A year ago, I told Dr. Cool that I thought my teeth were shifting. I told him that they just didn't feel like my teeth, anymore. He told me he thought I was crazy, because he couldn't see anything but perfectly striaght teeth by looking at me. He humored me and took some extra x-rays, though. He came back and, low and behold, I am not crazy! He said that, indeed, it did appear that my teeth had oh-so-very-hardly-even-slightly shifted, since the last x-rays. He said that the difference was so slight that he could barely tell with the x-rays and is really surprised that I notice anything, at all. But I did, and a shift is a shift, damn it! They feel funky to my toungue! He basically told me to get something for OCD and be on my way, b/c it would be foolish to spend $ to fix something so miniscule. FINE... WHATEVER, DR. COOL!
WEHEHEHEHELL! Today, after having my teeth cleaned and being lectured by the aformentioned Josie, in walks Dr. Cool. He examines me teeth and gives me the all-clear. He looks at me almost expectantly as I remind him of my teeth-shifting saga of the year-previous. He remembers. I tell him that lately my top teeth really don't feel straight. He confirms that, yes, I was right. After this year's x-rays, he sees a more prominent "show of crowding up top." But does he stop there? No way, Jack! He tells me that if it isn't corrected before it becomes a real problem then I will have to wear the braces for a longer amount of time. Well, okay, if you say s........... WAIT! HOLD THE PHONE! Did he say, "Braces?" Because I didn't sign up for that. I was thinking, something more along the lines of a retainer that I would just pop in at night for a month or so and VIOLLA! Perfectly striaght teeth, just like always and no one but Clark gets to see me in all my post-prepubescent glory. Dr. Cool now tells me that it won't be a big deal, b/c it won't take too long to correct and these days they make braces you can't even see.
There's just one problem there: SW Trailways (the company I do love working for) offers 2 dental plans: 1) The Spiffy plan that will pay for spiffy stuff. and 2) The Basic plan that pays for basic stuff. You will never guess which one we have. Yep, so if you make fun my impending metal mouth, I will beat the hell out of you and I won't feel bad about it.